Below are the 20 most recent journal entries recorded in Tara's LiveJournal:

[ << Previous 20 ]

Thursday, September 21st, 2006
4:41 pm	Interesting....maybe Your Birthdate: March 10 Independent and dominant, you tend to be the alpha dog in most situations. You're very confident, and hardly anything ever shakes you. Mundane tasks tend to drain you - you prefer to be making great plans. You are quite original. When people don't "get" you, it bothers you a lot. Your strength: Your ability to gain respect Your weakness: Caring too much what others think Your power color: Orange-red Your power symbol: Letter X Your power month: October What Does Your Birth Date Mean? (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, February 16th, 2006
2:23 pm	GREAT MUSIC **check it out** I know I haven't updated in a million years...that is too long of a story to go into... But if you love music, especially live music, you must check out: http://www.wolfgangsvault.com you want to listen to the vault player. welcome to your new addition. Current Music: vault radio (Comment on this)
Thursday, November 11th, 2004
7:18 am	Under the knife Moses is going in for the big cut. He shall no longer have the impulse to hump random objects. I can tell he knew that we were talking about something that wasn't going to be fun for him when we were at the vet. :) I don't have to work until later tonight. I am going to sit down and do somework at the computer and watch Shrek 2. I can't wait! (4 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, November 4th, 2004
4:15 pm	Feelin' relaxed I have sent the majority of my day just relaxing. Although, I have accomplished a few minor yet important things! *set up my wireless network *took Moses on a walk *successfully hooked up my DVD/VHS player *found all my tax papers *worked on my scooter and went for a ride not bad.. I woul dlike to just lay around the rest of the day, but I do have to go out and purchase somethings of necessity. I might even try and work on a mix. I needed today. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
9:37 am	Many days...weeks...months.. I can't believe that it has been so long since I have made a post. The really sad thing is that I am constatnly on here. I check LJ at least two times a day. I am always wondering how everyone is doing and what is going on. I am just too lazy...maybe not lazy. I think that on one hand it is so much easier for me to just not post. When things start going on, sometimes it is far easier to just deal with them and internalize them. I know I know....that is not the way to deal with stuff...but hey that is what I am going with. It is also the perfect recipe for me losing my mind and going postal one day. Look on the bright side, at least some of you can say, "I knew that girl before she completely lost her freaking mind." Today is my first day off in something like 8 days. It feels like 8 months. The stress level that I have been dealing with for the last couple of weeks cannot be healthy. I can't wait for everything to calm down just even half a notch. I don't like feeling on edge. It isn't good for me or anyone that has to deal with me. I think my goal for today is to do just about nothing really productive. :) I did just hook up my new network system. I am now wireless in mi casa! Let me count the millions of way that I love this. For all you know, I could be sitting on my toilet typing this right now. lol. gross, but funny. I also want to hook up my new VCR/DVD player to my tv. That is all taking into consideration that I can figure out my freaking cable box and that whole connection mess. Since when did it become so easy to hook up a wireless network, but trying to hook up anything to your digital cable box takes a degree from MIT? I have also recently purchased an assload of books. I may have been stress for the last ba-zillion weeks...but I have been practicing a little retail theraphy. :) I might start reading a couple of them. Wouldn't it just be dreamy to think about having a day where you didn't even get dressed? You just laid in bed, had a pile of books and played on your computer. Well, a girl can dream. I could say something about the election..but quite frankly...I don't want to admit that it happened. I *really* *really* was disappointed. The thing that makes me even more upset is that we went to our local gay pub to have a few drinks and watch the election and we just ask our bartender is she voted. She looked at me like I was crazy. There were all these young gay americans (no capitalization on purpose) who didn't even vote! I know I pissed some of them off when I told them how interestingly sad I found it that they were hanging out at the bar watching the election...talking all this crap...and didn't even vote! What don't people understand! Why can't we get people to physically go to the polls and vote! Hell this year they could have voted just about anytime they wanted to. I was deeply saddened. Do people associate voting with their horrible history or civics class in high school? This is seriously one of the reasons a girl gave me. If that is the case we really have problems. I am going to take up a call that a friend of my put out and I am going to get active! I can't take this anymore. I can't stand seeing all that red on the map on election night when there is a big boob like Bush behind the red. Current Mood: contemplative Current Music: news on in the background (5 Comments |Comment on this)
Monday, October 11th, 2004
1:51 am	Farewell May you walk amoung the clouds and the saints, Superman! (Comment on this)
Saturday, September 4th, 2004
11:49 am	Any Suggestions I am looking for a good book. Does anyone have any suggestions? (1 Comment |Comment on this)
11:40 am	Hanging WOW it is hotter than hot up here. I can't believe it. We went from really cool weather to holy "f" it is hot weather in just a matter of hours. Things are pretty good here. I am just trying to relax and enjoy my day off. I think we are going to go see Harry Potter today. I can't believe I waited this long to see the movie. I am nearly ashamed. On the news front, we are trying to plan our vacation. I believe we are going to go to our favorite Florida vacation spot. I need to get my ass in a tanning booth so I don't burn myself to a crisp. We have decide to drive this time. Since we are planning everything so late, last minute the airfare is through the roof right now. We can save at least 2-3 hundred dollars just by driving alone. That isn't even counting what we are going to save my not renting a car! So what if I am going to be a cranky as mother during the drive! (Comment on this)
Wednesday, August 25th, 2004
1:32 pm	wondering I think I am depressed. Today, I have been consumed with the thought same thought: I wonder if I ever cross any of my ex's minds.... It is interesting....especially since the majority of my ex's are now with men. I wonder if they ever hear a song on the radio or see something that reminds them of me? I don't even mean like romantically...I would hope they don't think of me like that any longer. I just wonder on a straight up "wonder what she's doing now" level. Ever wonder if you matter? Are you just a random body that floats through life bumping off people impacting them for a bit...only to be turned into less than diftwood in the ocean of their memories? I am such a mess lately. I have to be going to through PMS. Or I really might be depressed...but I am not sure why. I have been having less than impressive thoughts lately. I think I am disappointed in myself. I could be the world's biggest asshole if I would only allow myself half a chance. Current Mood: crushed Current Music: case of you (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Tuesday, August 24th, 2004
8:11 pm	Public Service Post ***do not attempt to google your ex's**** (3 Comments |Comment on this)
7:47 pm	Long Over Due and Slightly Depressed Angie has been gone for a while. It seems one of us is always traveling for work. I am getting ready to leave for Warrensville, unless I can find a way out of it. I miss Angie. I miss our time together on so many levels. It probably doesn't help that I am listening to really sappy ass sad music that I am notorious for listening to at all the wrong times. After 28 years, I don't see a reason to break a streak. Work is going pretty good. It is stressful as hell. I think this type of retail is perfect for self haters. Great great highs....and really really low lows. Nothing like kicking your own ass when you are down! lol The group of exec's I work with are cool. I really like them. It is so strange to me that I am always so afraid to be put in new situations and meet new people...but then I nearly always end up really liking these new people. It doesn't hurt that the females I work with are very hot. :) I am trying to make myself a new mix to listen to on the way to work. I actually need to make a few. I need them for all the levels. Pick me up...pissed off...soothing...fun loving...driving home for the weekend off. Angie is coming home on Wed night. I want to do something special. I must dig back into my mind and pull something special out of my ass. I feel like Doogie Howser all of a sudden. Doogie the first TV psuedo blogger.... I loved that show. I wonder if it is on DVD...everything seems to be anymore. Current Mood: lonely Current Music: When you say nothing at all.... (1 Comment |Comment on this)
Saturday, August 7th, 2004
10:28 pm	Note to self I need to find something that is just for me. Anything...music, a book, a hobby. I feel like a drone sometimes. I feel my brain slowly clogging up. (1 Comment |Comment on this)
10:05 pm	Crazy Wild Wiped Out I am so tired. I need to sleep. What am I doing? Sure as hell not sleeping. I am watching Law & Order...Listening to John Edward's speech at the DNC. (You can download all the speeches for free on iTunes.)..and messing around on the internet. It is like I have been waiting so long to get to "hang" that the time I have I am trying to cram it all in. Tonight was my 10 year class reunion. I kinda wanted to go, but not really. It is strange. I know that I am so different than anyone there. Sometimes when I am around people that I went to school with, I feel like I have to spend so much energy biting my tongue. I want to smack them half of the time for the stuff hateful shit that comes out of there mouth. At the same time, this is where I am from and by hating them...I feel like I am hating a part of myself. (Comment on this)
Friday, July 30th, 2004
12:10 am	Long Week Wow...I have been working for what seems like forever. In reality, it has only been 9 days. It sure has been a really long run. Things are going well at work. It has just been a really long spell. I feel like I was being prepared to do my job for so long...and now I still feel like a baby calf. Wobbly knees and unsure....even though I know better. This is not my first time doing such things. I think I was starting to psych myself out for no real reason. Sometimes, I am such a mind fuck. So on my "days off", we are heading to a wedding in Peoria. We are taking Moses. This should be one hell of a trip. I can already imagine how much that little pup is going to wine. Maybe, we will get lucky and he will decide to sleep. I am not counting on it though. One of the highlights of this week as been that an old friend of college called me out of the blue. I hadn't talked to her in quite awhile. It was nice. I miss her. We talked about some great memories. I might try and go to homecoming and see if I can catch her. I will have to see. Hell, I don't even know when homecoming is! I guess that would be the first thing to do. It would also be good to get a chance to see some people and profs at Truman. Keep on rawkin' in the free world. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 20th, 2004
6:06 pm	Looking In Do you ever wonder who you really are? Well, I do....a bunch. I have so many things/thoughts running through my head. I need to get them out. Blah, no energy for it now. Nothing is wrong. This is more in likely the first time in my life..I have been "searching" when everything is going well. Usually, it always happpens when I feel everything sux. (Comment on this)
9:35 am	Break in action Last night went well. Remember how I was saying that I would like to have a day just to goof off? Well, the schedule at work got changed and I have today off. Woo Woo. The down side of the whole deal is that when I go back....I have a 9 day stretch before I have a day off. Suck city. Plans for today: little cleaning little wash finally hook up gamecube and play new game stay out of the heat (Comment on this)
Monday, July 19th, 2004
8:14 am	First day jitters Well, it is finally here. My offical first day in my own store. Actually, I won't even be in my store today. I am going to a meeting at my STL's house. Can you believe that it is already time to start doing X-mas planning? Freaky. Things have been very busy around here. I am waiting for things to slow down someday soon, hopefully. I just want to hang out totally for one day and not feel bad about how I "should" be doing something entirely different. Praying for that day. I have been writing all these thank you cards to all the exec's that I have been training with these last couple of weeks. I even made a CD to give to all of them. Yes, I know I am a total dork. Deal with it. I did a "songs that" type cd. I really like the cd. I am sure they will have no clue about some stuff on there. Hopefully, they will at least listen to it once. I think it gives a peek into who I am and what I am like. Anyway, I enjoyed making it...so who cares! I need to go drop off these cd's & notes soon. I think I am going to wash and clean out my car on the way home. Lord knows, I need to. I feel so bad that I have even let my car get remotely close to dirty. I told myself when I bought it that I would clean it every week. Wishful thinking huh. (2 Comments |Comment on this)
Thursday, July 8th, 2004
10:30 am	Flux Everything about my tech training and business college has been in a constant state of flux. We are told one thing...another thing happens. I guess so is the way of retail. I found out last night that a store I want to be placed in has a opening. I really want to be there and they (the people who are already there) would like to have me there. The problem lies in the fact that I have already been "placed". I am not going to whine too much about this. BUT..... If wish were fishes.... I work tonight. I am a little worn right now. I have been staying up way too late. Moses gets us up early. All in all, this results in something like 5-6 hours sleep. This is normally a great amount of sleep. After a while though, you just want to sleep oh about 10 1/2 hours. Maybe that is asking too much. I would take it in a heart beat. (Comment on this)
Tuesday, July 6th, 2004
6:43 am	random thoughts Kerry has announced that he is going to offer John Edwards the position as his running mate! Yeah. on the other hand...I saw Farenheit 9/11 last night. I recommend it. (Comment on this)
6:11 am	Quick Post Update Wow, Things have been so busy and quite so boring at the same time. I don't really know how to explain much beyond that. I have been so horrible about updating. It isn't like I am not on this site at least 3 times a day. I am always jumping on and seeing what everyone is up too. I just haven't felt much like writing. I personally think I am on the verge of a "breakdown" or "break-through" of sorts and I have been avoiding opening up for fear of what might end up happening. Things as a whole are going great up here. Maybe this is why I have this feeling that the bottom is going to drop out. I am in my final 2 weeks of work before I am in my own store. It is very nerve wrecking. I just want to get down there and get it over with on one hand, but then on the other.... I met some really great people in Business College. We were able to "bond". You know driving a hour and a half each way on top of working a 9 hour day with do that to you. Moses is wonderful. I have pictures as soon as I download them onto the computer. It has been wonderful watching him grow and learn things. Many laughs, indeed! My goal is that I will once again start posting at least once a day. I think I feel better when I do. That or I need to start my paper journal up again. Who knows. Off I go to let Moses out! (Comment on this)